Pregnant - On Paper!

Well, this post is LONG over-due! We have been so busy doing paperwork and reading and educating ourselves that we have seldom paused to reflect - at least on this blog. So, here goes nothing:

We are adopting again! And we are adopting from a country in Africa. Sooner than later. Let me start from the beginning:

I have always wanted to adopt. I think I had the "adoption gene" As a little girl and in my teenage years I always envisioned getting married and adopting. I really never thought much about being pregnant. Not sure why. Just did. My mom even remembers me sharing these things. In college I did my big senior project on adoption (I was a child and family development major) - ate it up. Loved every minute. But I never thought about going into the adoption field as a professional. Just a parent. During my senior year I was engaged to my now hubby, Kenny. Before we were engaged and began discussing marriage, I told him my dream of adopting. And I told him I just knew, for some strange reason, that I wouldn't be able to become pregnant. I had never had any health problems but something in my heart knew. (Now I can see that was God preparing my heart for things to come.)

Once we were married and got to the stage of wanting to become parents, I begged Kenny once more to "adopt first, pregnancy second" because by this time I wanted to go through a pregnancy. For many good reasons, I agreed with my husband - we were young and should try to conceive first. After about 4-6 months of "trying" I had that unsettling feeling that something wasn't right. I begged my OB/GYN to do some tests and come to find out, both Kenny and I had some fertility issues. Within a 3 month window of time, we had seen the OB/GYN, 2 male specialists and a fertility specialist AND done 2 rounds of very simple treatments. It was evident. We'd have to proceed to the "big guns" of treatment.

We planned and planned and got VERY close twice to starting treatment. Each time God slammed the door shut. We KNEW that He was leading us back to adoption. And this time, it was evident to both of us. Both of our hearts were open. I was shocked and in awe as I had been praying for that for years!

Within a few more months we brought home our sweet little boy.....I am not going to share the details of his adoption here. That story is such a special one and I want him to be the one to share it when he is ready. Just know - it was a domestic, open adoption. And God has blessed us beyond measure with our son and the addition of extended family members through this adoption!

When Garrett turned one, I was ready again for another one! But I knew it was probably too soon and so we waited until right before he turned two to start the adoption process again. We went to many agency meetings to find the right one for us and even looked into various types of adoption (embryo, international and of course domestic). And really, Kenny and I mulled over this decision. We spent many days and nights tearful and confused because nothing made sense. I know that's hard to understand for some of you - just know it's complicated. So, we decided to put it all on hold for six months.

During that six months numerous life changes occurred that made us think having one child, at least for the next few years, would be ideal. I even went so far as to get rid of EVERYTHING baby - the crib, the bottles, EVERYTHING! Fast forward another 6-9 months and we decided, based on changes in life again, that we could handle and really wanted to parent more children. So, the dreaded journey of deciding "how" to adopt began again.

Finally, this past December our hearts were in agreement and we saw God opening doors for us to adopt from Africa. We attended our first meeting at our adoption agency, Buckner, and got to work on the application. By the end of January, our application had been submitted and by mid-February it was approved and we received an invitation to attend a two day educational seminar on international adoption. By mid-March our home study was completed and by the end of March it was approved. We are now working on our dossier (the last of the paperwork trail before we wait on the referral of a child).

It has taken us a full three months to tell all of our family and most of our friends our exciting news and hence didn't want to blare it here until then. But now, it's official! The three of us will be going to Africa (for legality reasons, we cannot disclose the exact country on the web) hopefully, God willing, by the end of 2008 or early 2009 to bring home our child!

I will post more in the days to come about why we chose Africa, what type of child will be a part of our family, how we are preparing, etc. I thought for now, this was enough to soak in! We are joyfully excited to be on this journey and can't wait to see how God will bless us with another child!